JournalingForGod

I don’t know about you, but if I could relate to one character in the Bible, I would say i relate to Moses…

Exodus 4:11-13

^“10 Moses said to the Lord, “Pardon your servant, Lord. I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.”¹¹ The Lord said to him, “Who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind? Is it not I, the Lord? ¹² Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say.” ¹³ But Moses said, “Pardon your servant, Lord. Please send someone else”.

Reading the story of Moses, you see how God had so much mercy and grace over his life. You see I could relate so much to Moses because I used to be Moses and still sometimes I struggle. I wouldn’t say I am slow in speech, but sometimes what goes on in my head isn’t what I am able to deliver when I speak. God has helped me so much; you have no idea. It’s funny because I would tell God in other words that I can’t speak; why me? I would compare myself to others and tell God, why am I even in this position; I’m not like XYZ. Now I see the positions that he has been placing me in are crazy. When you trust in God, he helps you through your weaknesses. You see, we get it so twisted a lot of the times! It’s not about us; it’s never been about us! I love how God reminded Moses of who he was. God uses our weaknesses because he never wants us to think that it was by our might that we’ve been able to do it. We are nothing without him; we can’t do anything without the living water. I analyze my life and understand that everything I am is because of him. I am a pastor, Bible Institute teacher, preacher, etc. Not by my own merit, but because of him. You see, God just needs a willing vessel to do what he wants to do. God doesn’t qualify us by how great we are, like the world does; he sees beyond us. I’ve noticed that God uses those whom people believe are unqualified; how beautiful is our God! When I say that he truly qualifies the unqualified, I can truly attest to that. Why? Because that is what he has done with my very life. I am not the greatest speaker; I am unworthy. There are so many other people who I believe are more deserving. But again… it’s not about what I think! The truth is none of us will ever be more worthy or deserving. You see, Moses was supposed to understand in that moment that he was never meant to do it alone. God literally told him to go because he would have his back, and he told him that he would lead him. God is so amazing that he doesn’t let you go through it alone; he is right by your side. There have been so many things that I have asked God for, and he has helped me. I used to feel so dumb reading the Word because I couldn’t understand it. Now I understand it easier, and he uses me to recite verses on the spot! If I want you to remember anything from what I am saying, it’s to remember it’s never been about us; it’s all about our heavenly Father. If God is the answer, why do we think that we can do it without him? If he is the one that led us there or took us out, why do we suddenly think we can branch off? We need him, not for what he gives, but because he is the source that keeps us alive. I don’t know about you, but what takes off weight from me is understanding that God doesn’t see me like the world does. You see, people around us could see us as capable one second and then tomorrow talk bad about us, saying that we won’t/can’t make it. But you know how God sees us; the way he sees us never changes! He isn’t like the world that prefers performance rather than authenticity. God wants people who love him wholeheartedly. None of us are perfect, but we do have the perfect one on our side so let’s stay rooted in him. Let him use you through your weaknesses; the word of God says in my weaknesses I am made strong. Meaning where we lack or are limited, we are actually strong in God if we let him help us. If you are reading, I want you to know that you may struggle in something, or you may not think you are capable. But let me tell you that if God has called you, it’s because he is the answer; that will help/lead you through it. I used to think that I couldn’t be a pastor, preach, or speak. But God helped me understand that in my weaknesses he is made strong. Meaning that he was going to help me even though I struggle. I wasn’t going to do it alone; he is going to help me. Slowly but surely, I’ve been able to comprehend this very fact and have seen it evidently in my life. You aren’t capable because of any of your doing, but simply because it’s God through you. God wants to glorify himself through you; will you be a willing vessel who understands his/her place? The truth is that God has greater plans in store for us than we can ever imagine, like he did with Moses. God had in stored to use Moses to deliver a whole nation. God met him where he was and even gave him a helper. God has mercy on us, but we also have to trust God and know that he knows what he is doing. We also have to comprehend that it’s him through us. It wasn’t about what Moses could do, but what God wanted to do through him!

We often times hear this phrase, but we don’t understand the depth of this saying. It’s not that we are going to be perfect, but sometimes we get ourselves into situations that could of saved us time and pain. Actions have consequences…. What we do can affect us, whether in the long term or present. Sometimes we say or do things that not only affect us but others! We need to think twice about what we do and say. I’m not only talking about the small actions but the big ones too… Actions that you and I both know have hurt others. We can’t take things back once they have been done. Sins also committed that affect the way people view us or others. I know we can’t always predict what’s going to happen. But if we are being honest… alot of the situations we have been through is because we have put ourselves in that position. Not only are there repercussions for us, but others as well. We human beings, I’ve noticed tend to fix our eyes on the now and not the long term. We need to remember that we can’t go back in time and change what is already done. We can only focus on our present and what we do going forward. We wonder why things happen but forget we put ourselves in situations… We aren’t cautious about our actions! I really encourage you to think about this because God is always working for our good. But let’s not abuse his grace, we also have free will. Let’s learn to listen to God when he tells us something for the first time. Let’s listen to Gods direction and correction. You know how many mistakes I’ve made, that I look back at now and understood that I could of done it better. Now what’s done is done, we can’t go back. But what we can do is change how we do things going forward. We truly have to learn from our mistakes, so we don’t continue committing the same ones. The great thing about our God is that nothing we go through goes in vain. But still, if there are things we can avoid, let’s try… Let’s avoid some pains and mistakes, so we could live more accordingly to how God calls us to live.

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it” Proverbs‬ ‭4‬:‭23‬ ‭NIV‬‬.

I don’t think we understand what this verse is asking of us. I think sometimes we human beings take this verse lightly, I say that because this was me. God is calling us to guard our hearts for a reason… Sometimes we put ourselves, and our hearts in situations where we ruin the purity of it.

““Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God” Matthew‬ ‭5‬:‭8‬ ‭NASB2020‬‬.

This verse is also so beautiful! I feel like sometimes we allow this world or the situations that we go through mark us and stain us. We allow sin, greed, anger, jealousy, rejection, shame, lying/lies, pride, etc to stain our hearts… It’s so dangerous, that is why I believe these two verses go together. They are so important because it’s telling us if we don’t guard our hearts, we will contaminate it. Why do we do the things that we do because we’ve allowed it to be sown into our hearts. God never intends or wants our hearts to be impure, but sometimes we put ourselves in situations where they become so. Some examples are… God tells us to not let that situation sink into our hearts, to cast our cares/worries unto him… Sometimes he tells us to not get with that person…. Sometimes he tells us to heal from traumas… Sometimes he tells us to break generational curses… Sometimes he tell’s us to not idolize other gods. Sometimes he tells us to let go… Sometimes he tells us to not let the love of money control our lives. There are so many things God tries to take care of us from, but we don’t listen. We are stubborn and sometimes think we know more than God! I say this a little frustrated because you know how many situations I’ve been in like these. There were so many moments in my life where I allowed my heart to be contaminated, I put my heart on the line of getting hurt. I put myself in heartbreaks… I put myself in situations where I allowed my heart to become impure. I would sadden the heart of my Father up above. God doesn’t say things because he doesn’t know. He says things because he’s already been at the beginning, the middle and the end of times… God is so beautiful that he doesn’t force us to love him, he allows us to make that choice. God is a graceful God, and he most definitely won’t waste any moment as long as you truly repent and mean it. But wouldn’t it be nice if we listened to God the first time or through what he states in his word? I don’t know about you but I’m tired of making the same mistakes over and over again. I want to learn the first time and trust that my God knows best when he tells me something. Now I know sometimes it’s easier said than done. But it’s time we start listening to God, you know how many things we would avoid…? If you are reading please understand how guarding your heart is so important! I’ve learned from God that to him, the state in which your heart’s is in is so important! I mean he states clearly in his word, I said it above “for everything you do flows from it”. What we do reveals what is truly in our hearts.

I think sometimes we Christians can be like the young rich ruler. We ask him questions to help our walk with him, but then aren’t able to obey. Or we get into a state where we feel like we can do it on our own. We ask God what do we have to do to get into eternal life, or maybe unconsciously we have this thought. Culture likes to do this a lot and it confuses us. Sometimes culture and society tell us that all we have to do to get saved is go to church Sundays. Or it tells us all we have to do is give. Which is not true, it is something that we should do. I mean we all know the only way we will be entering to heaven is our simple true belief in Christ as our Lord and Savior. Now I say we are like this young rich ruler because as Christ is explaining some of the commandments, the young rich ruler says but I have followed all of them. Let’s read what the text says,

“And he said to Him, “Teacher, I have kept all these things from my youth.” Looking at him, Jesus showed love to him and said to him, “One thing you lack: go and sell all you possess and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow Me.” But he was deeply dismayed by these words, and he went away grieving; for he was one who owned much property” Mark‬ ‭10‬:‭20‬-‭22‬ ‭NASB2020.

Christ told him the very thing he lacked which is to give all that he had, to lay one more thing down to God. You see there are things in our hearts and lives that we still haven’t layed down to God. We say we trust him but we still try to take matters into our own hands. When he asks us to give to him we find it difficult to do so. What’s even crazier is that sometimes we do it unconsciously. ‬‬
When God tells us to do something, even though it’s so hard we must do it. We can’t say we follow God and believe in him, when we just follow one thing he calls us to do. We have to strive to do all of them. We forget to understand that this life isn’t the end for us, we still have heaven. We focus on what’s perishable when God wants us to focus on what’s imperishable. We hold on to things that God never told us to do so. We must lay down because God knows best. He knows all things, and sees all things. We may not always understand what God does, but we must trust him. If we truly follow Christ he may ask us to sacrifice some things, now we have to see if we are willing to do so… What is more important to you, your own self seeking desires or Gods will…?

What I’ve learned about God over time is that he breaks traditions, ideologies, cultures, etc of this world… There are things and patterns of this world that do not align to Gods will for us. There are thinking patterns that this world thinks it’s okay. They are things that unsciously follow. I’ve noticed and this is not to judge, but just to make a statement. There are people who are catholic, that I’ve heard are only catholic because it’s been passed down generationally. They follow that religion simply because their ancestors followed it. Which is so bad because they don’t even allowed themselves to get to know God truly. They follow him simply for tradition and culture. There are so many erroneous ideologies that some culture have. Each culture has their thing and I’ve learned to understand that. But I’ve realized and comprehended that if I’m going to follow Christ, I have to let that all go… Some cultures make it seem like it’s okay to gossip about others. Some say men should be male chauvinists. That it should be normal to have broken families in society. That sex before marriage is okay. That you are prosperous only if you have a lot of money. I can honestly keep going, there are so many things this world has distorted from Gods original design. God is clear in his world…

“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.”
‭‭Romans‬ ‭12‬:‭2‬ ‭NASB2020‬‬
This is so clear, and has ministered to my life greatly! I say that because it is so true, there were so many things that I thought were okay because it’s what I saw growing up. It’s what I thought was normal and okay because it’s all I knew. But God truly breaks tradition and culture. I thought it was okay because I saw my family, friends, and society do it. But when I came to Christ, God taught me that I had to let go of that. God taught me that those thoughts or patterns were not of him. God teaches us a new way through Jesus. Even in the Bible we see that when Jesus came to earth he broke some traditions… The Pharisees and other cultures were used to a certain way. But Christ taught that his way was better and the truth! With Christ I felt like a huge weight was lifted off of my shoulder. I don’t feel like I have to pretend anymore. I honestly feel free and want to live wholeheartedly for God. I strive to renew my mind daily because I want to model Jesus. I want to think more like Jesus and walk more like him. Being in Jesus I no longer want to imitate the world but rather imitate Christ! So I reiterate to you the word of God, do not conform to the patterns of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. There are some things that we think is normal and okay, but when you truly come to Christ we must let go in order to live a true life in Christ.

I find this topic so beautiful…. Because it is so evident in my life !! Now looking back, I see how Gods hand has really come through in my life! The way I glow now is so different… I think, see, dress and walk differently. There is something about living a new life in Christ that changes you. I remember before Christ the way I would dress, talk, and think. It might sound silly but your whole being really changes when you are in Christ. Now being in Christ I find that my ideologies have changed. The way I speak to people is different. The way I see/treat people is different. The way I see myself is different. The way I walk and carry myself is different. I remember when I first came to Christ, the way I came to him was so dirty; Physically, emotionally and mentally. Now really thinking about it, I was a completely different person. Where God has brought me to has changed so vastly from where I was before. I can truly say I am a new creation, thanks to Christ! I had so many hidden wounds. I was very lost and confused. I was full of rejection, depression, and unforgiveness. I had thoughts that were not Christ like. I was a slave to sin truly. Until God gave me new clothing through Jesus Christ. He gave me hope, a future, joy, love, etc. He gave me a new beginning in him. He allowed me to try again but this time with him. He freed me from my sins and wickedness.

“And He was also telling them a parable: “No one tears a piece of cloth from a new garment and puts it on an old garment; otherwise he will both tear the new, and the patch from the new garment will not match the old. And no one pours new wine into old wineskins; otherwise the new wine will burst the skins and it will be spilled out, and the skins will be ruined. But new wine must be put into fresh wineskins.” Luke‬ ‭5‬:‭36‬-‭38‬ ‭NASB2020‬‬
This parable above was speaking about this very topic we speak about. When you invite the new, a new you comes out. If we are a new creation we cannot expect to stay with the old. Jesus transforms and frees us… The old and the new do not go together. If we are going to live new we have to be new. When you are truly in Christ you see the distinction between you and the world. Back then I thought like the world and did things like the world. Now I have the mind of Christ and still, I’m still being renewed. It’s not a one day thing, it’s a constant thing… Now, I see myself bearing the fruits of the spirit because I’m in the spirit. You bear what you are in. If you are in the spirit you will bear things of the spirit. If you are in the flesh you will bear fruits of the flesh. There is a verse on this topic as well. With my new clothing I strive to be more like Jesus. With my new clothing I’m passionate for the things of my Father in heaven. Now I see myself the way God does, so my whole appearance has changed. God changes you from the inside and out. In Christ there is a transformation…

“Therefore if anyone is in Christ, this person is a new creation; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come.”
‭‭2 Corinthians‬ ‭5‬:‭17‬ ‭NASB2020‬‬

The word of God says that talents and gifts are irrevocable.

Romans 11:28-29 states,

“In relation to the gospel they are enemies on your account, but in relation to God’s choice they are beloved on account of the fathers; for the gifts and the calling of God are irrevocable.”

A lot of the time we see gifted people in the kingdom of God but that doesn’t necessarily mean everything. You can sing amazing and your heart be far from God. You can dance and do something so well, but your heart be far a part from God. Look at people who are in the world, they have alot of gifts and talents, yet their hearts are still far a part from God. Something so important I’ve learned from my walk with God is that what’s most important is the state and posture of our heart. I’m pretty sure I talked about it in one of these blogs and God also helped me write a preaching upon it. But the posture of our heart before God is so important. Sometimes we do things to be seen by others. Who cares if no one sees us, you know who does? The one who sees all things our Father in Heaven, creator of the heavens and earth. He’s more worried about the condition in which our hearts are in. We can give to the poor and have so many works. But if our hearts were never really in it to please God, than it goes void… I don’t know about you but lately I’ve been thinking, I thank God he isn’t like man. With humans it’s usually about what you can do for them. People look at things differently than God does. People look at how well you do things, if you danced correctly. People look if you didn’t mess up in whatever you were doing. To reemphasize, God looks at the condition in which our hearts are in… Are we doing things to please God ? Or are we doing things as a performance, and to please those around us. I love that from God we cannot hide anything… In the beginning when God was walking he asked Adam and Eve a rhetorical question. He already knew what happened, because he is God… He asked because he wanted to hear from them. He wanted a relationship, just like he wants one with us. We can’t hide from God as much as we’d like to think so. He sees the depths of our hearts… The word of God says that he is looking for people to truly worship him in Spirit and in Truth. To conclude I just want you to know that God gave us gifts and talents to please him. He gave them to us to use for others, not as a selfish act for ourselves. Our gifts and talents are irrevocable, but one day we are going to give an account to God of what we did with the things he’s given us…

Our gifts and talents are to praise God and use it in service to others. But if we are doing it for selfish gains, what’s the point. When they should and are supposed to be used as worship for God.

As I was driving today, I realized that God really does not waste a moment. A lot of times we think the circumstances around us or things we go through go in vain. But I believe even the unplanned things God uses. Even the very things we wished never happened to us, God uses it for his glory and honor. You see we can’t always control the very things we go through. Nor can we understand the things we will face in life. But know that there is one person who will always understand the trials and tribulations we will face, God. In my life this topic has been so evident! There are many things that I’ve done that were not a coincidence. This whole blog was not a coincidence. God gave me a prophetic word that I would be doing something like this and other stuff, still yet to come. It started off with me writing to God about the things I’ve went through. It was something very personal I believe, and God had other plans with it. I’ve always been a writer. There are so many dreams, ideas and plans in my heart that God instilled in me way long ago. I thought it was just me, but no it was God who planted it in my heart. I also remember when I was younger I would write preachings. I never thought much of them, but now I realized why I was writing all along. It was because God had a plan. I always said, God some of the preachings sound like they are for a younger crowd. Now, I am a youth pastor at my church and have also been asked to preach in other churches. I have been asked to preach so far nearby and Honduras. Soon I will be going to Dominican Republic to preach to the youth. All the things I have gone through I’ve been able to minister to people whom God has put in my path to minister to. What the devil really meant for evil, God used it for his glory. The thing is we can’t erase the things we’ve been through. But I know a God who will use it to lift you up and for his glory. He is just a good God like that. The devil wanted it for us to be dead, but through Jesus Christ, God uses it to bring us alive for him! God does not leave his children alone. Now I say all this because I used to regret the things I’ve done and went through. Some of these things I couldn’t even control. The things I could control I was so angry that I did. But now I’m thankful that I went through them so I can help those around me who are going through it. So I can show and tell them how God saved me. So i can lead them to the answer who will never fail them. I know the things you may have gone through hurt or sucked. But I know a God who wants to show you a different perspective through his lens of what you had to endure. God wastes no moment for the things we go through, he has a purpose. Just give your life to Jesus completely and he will show you.

What are we doing in the moments when we don’t know what’s going to happen. What are we doing in the moments where what we are seeing isn’t looking too good. It’s like time and time again, God is constantly speaking and we aren’t listening… We forget all the promises in the Bible. We forget all the things God has warned us about in his word. We forget what he has told us is to come and what we should do while it happens. We forget all the truths that God has given to us… I am so passionate about this topic because this season has been hard guys. I’ve been living in moments where my faith is being extremely tested. We say we believe in God and who he is, but when we are tested with it we fail. The truth is we don’t always have an answer… but one truth that will remain is that Jesus is the truth, the way and life. God is nearer than he’s ever been. He does not forsaken us, we forsake him because of our circumstances/unbelief. Everything that we go through isn’t shocking to him, he’s seen it all!!! He’s omnipresent, omniscient and omnipotent. Our God sees all things and knows all things. Now what is our job or duty when we are in the midst of adversity? To stay fixed on him, on his truth, on his word and who he is. Just because man fails it does not mean God has failed. Our first mistake is putting our faith/hope on man. God is not man, he is perfect in all his ways. He doesn’t change like we human beings do. I thank God for this season, although it’s been a rough season, he’s been through it all with me. He’s exposed a lot to me about my faith and heart. He’s brought to light the things in me that need fixing… Listen, we won’t always understand why things happen. But if we stay fixed on Jesus, I promise we will come out even more victorious than we already are. I’ve been saying it for a while, more than us getting what we’ve been praying for, he’s more fixed on the posture of our heart. The truth is that many of us say a lot of things, but when push comes to shove we reveal the opposite of what we say we believe. Our actions don’t match our faith. A lot of us prove that our faith is dead, because if we truly believed… our faith would be backed up by our works. I think that sometimes our faith needs to be tested, because it truly reveals the state in which our hearts are in… In the midst of our adversities we cannot forget about who our Father is. We cannot forget the things he has stated and repeatedly taught us in his word. We must not forget everything he has taught us through the course of our lives, because we need these teachings for ourselves and those around us.

This verse…. “This people honors Me with their lips, But their heart is far away from Me. ‘And in vain do they worship Me, Teaching as doctrines the commandments of men” (Matthew‬ ‭15‬:‭8‬-‭9‬ ‭NASB2020‬‬).
I don’t know about you, but that verse is so powerful! If you read that chapter it’s literally how we act sometimes… We say we believe and follow Gods truth, but what we really follow is this world’s indoctrination. Let’s follow God truly and walk in his truth, believing in who he says he is.

I love this topic so much… This has been something that God has been ministering to me so deeply about.

The word of God speaks about how if we are in sin we are a slave to sin. Now if we are truly in Christ, we are free indeed…

”They answered Him, “We are Abraham’s descendants and have never been enslaved to anyone; how is it that You say, ‘You will become free’?” Jesus answered them, “Truly, truly I say to you, everyone who commits sin is a slave of sin. Now the slave does not remain in the house forever; the son does remain forever”

John‬ ‭8‬:‭33‬-‭35‬ ‭NASB2020‬‬.

I love this version of John 8:36

“So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed”.

If we truly believe in Jesus Christ we will truly be free. Meaning we will be free from sin. But we have to truly be in the son. A true Christ follower does not live in sin, that person has died to their old sinful ways/life. That’s why I think this truth that Jesus came to set us free… to save us… is so powerful !!! We undermine this truth, victory and freedom. If we are truly in Christ why are we still in constant depression, anger, resentment, suicidal ideation, loneliness, doubt, lust, idolatry, etc. If we are truly living in Christ why are we still living in bondage. If Jesus already defeated death why are we still living in death. The wages of sin is death… meaning we will be spiritually dead. Not too as long ago I was speaking to someone about how people twist scriptures in the Bible. The word of God says that nothing can separate us from the love of God. Which is true, but there is a difference… God loves us all!!! Nothing can separate us from the love that he has for all of his creation. But sin can separate us from his presence…!!! I’m sorry I am so passionate about this, but it’s so important to me because we need to truly comprehend this. That’s why the Father had to create a redeemer because we kept missing the mark. We need/ed someone to redeem us, to connect us back to the Father. Jesus paid that ultimate price and we owe it to him to receive his true freedom. We need to let go of everything and give him our all. It does not mean we won’t go through things. Let’s not get it twisted, we were never promised a life without trials and tribulations. In fact we were told that we will endure these things, but in Jesus we are more than victorious! We need to stop living in bondage when Jesus already freed us… He already paid it all, we don’t need to fight for it. We are not what we are seeing right now. We are not our past, we are not what we will go through. “ For we live by faith and not by sight” remember this. Let’s receive the fruits of the Spirit which is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Even when times are hard receive Gods strength. We try to do freedom on our own, but we can’t possibly attain it or receive it on our own. It is only through Jesus Christ that you will receive true freedom. Live in him, walk with him and you will see how your life is transformed. If we are truly in Jesus we should be able to have all these fruits even when times are difficult. We don’t live by what we see… we live by faith. The word of God says,

”Now faith is the certainty of things hoped for, a proof of things not seen” Hebrews‬ ‭11‬:‭1‬ ‭NASB2020‬‬.

We don’t see it yet, but we believe that it’s there already. We need to use faith more, we don’t see God but we must use our faith to believe that he is there. You may not see that you are going to get out of that situation but use faith to see/believe it. Even though you don’t see a way out, use faith to believe that you are already out. God clearly left us and told us to use faith for a reason. If not he would have said for we live by sight and not by faith instead. He said it for a reason, because he knew it was an important tool that we would need to endure this life. If you are truly in Christ live truly free indeed… Living truly free and in Christ means that you are no longer a slave/governed by the ruler of this world, which is Satan.